CLEAN JOKES FOR KIDS

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CLEAN JOKES FOR KIDS & KIDS HUMOR

CLEAN JOKES FOR KIDS: Includes the following categories: FOOD, DRINK, CANDY, DIET (Yes, we have chubby kids), CHOCOLATE,  and BARBECUE HUMOR. In general, any topic related to FOOD, DRINK, or DIET, but especially for "kidz". 

--Mr. BIG KID: DANIEL WORONA "Rara Avis"

Please continue for lots of laughs, and ha ha's.



CANDY JOKE:

Q: WHAT COUNTRY DID CANDY COME FROM?
A: SWEETEN

COOKING JOKE:
Q: WHY ARE COOKS SO CRUEL?
A: BECAUSE THEY BEAT THE EGGS AND WHIP THE CREAM.

VEGETABLE JOKE:
Q: HOW DO YOU FIX A BROKEN PIZZA?
A: WITH TOMATO PASTE.

CHOCOLATE JOKE:
Q: HOW CAN YOU KEEP FROM GETTING A SHARP PAIN IN  YOUR EYE WHEN YOU DRINK CHOCOLATE MILK?
A: TAKE THE SPOON OUT OF THE GLASS.

DIETING JOKE:

Q: WHAT DO SEVEN DAY OF DIETING DO?

A: THEY MAKE ONE WEAK (WEEK).



CHOCOLATE TONGUE TWISTER: A CHEEKY CHIMP CHUCKED CHEAP CHOCOLATE CHIPS IN THE CHEAP CHOCOLATE CHIP SHOP.

OVERWEIGHT JOKE:

Q: WHAT DO YOU GET IF YOU CROSS AN OVERWEIGHT GOLFER AND A PAIR OF VERY TIGHT PANTS?

A: A HOLE IN ONE.



DOUGHNUT JOKE:

Q: WHY DID THE DONUT GO TO THE DENTIST?

A: IT NEEDED A CHOCOLATE FILLING.

DRINK JOKE:

Q: WHICH IS THE FUNNIEST SODA?

A: JOKE-A-COLA.

DRINK JOKE:

Q: WHERE CAN YOU GET MILKSHAKES?

A: FROM NERVOUS COWS.


TONGUE TWISTERS:

1. Q: WHAT IS WORST THAN A TONGUE TWISTER?
A: A TONGUE TWISTER WHILE CHEWING BUBBLE GUM.

Try this one while chewing bubble gum:
DOUBLE BUBBLE GUM, BUBBLES DOUBLE.



2. A GOOD COOK COULD COOK AS MANY COOKIES AS A GOOD COOK COULD COOK COOKIES.

3. FRESHLY-FRIED FAT FRYING FISH.

JOKE QUOTE:

DOGS LOOK UP TO YOU AND CATS LOOK DOWN ON YOU. GIVE ME A PIG. HE JUST LOOKS YOU IN THE EYE AND TREATS YOU LIKE AN EQUAL.

A BIG KID JOKE (For your mom and dad):

THE EASY WAY TO TEACH CHILDREN THE VALUE OF MONEY IS TO BORROW FROM THEM.

Do you have a SQUEAKY CLEAN KIDS JOKE, THANKSGIVING FOOD JOKE, FITNESS JOKE, or a CHRISTMAS FOOD JOKE you would like to share? Please e-mail me "Mr. Big Kid":

Please use your regular e-mail service to e-mail me at: dworona@yahoo.com.

(Please include the words CLEAN JOKES FOR KIDS in the Subject line.) If this HOT link does not work for you please use your regular e-mail service.

WARNING: More tee hee, hilarious, ho ho, ha ha humor and jokes for kids ahead. Please continue for JOKE QUOTES and KIDS HUMOROUS T-SHIRT SAYINGS.



Click on this "HOT"/active link to return to DANIEL WORONA'S more than 250,000  DIET HUMOR SAYINGS & JOKES website: http://danworona.50megs.com

This has been the #1 DIET HUMOR Web site in the world for nearly fifteen (15) years.

 


HAVE YOU VISITED THE FATTEST DIET HUMOR COLLECTION IN THE WORLD?
MORE THAN 250,000 DIET HUMOR SAYINGS, DIET JOKES, DIET QUOTES, DIET DROPOUT HUMOR, and CHOCOLATE HUMOR. This is a 55-year plus collection compiled by yours truly.

This has been the #1 DIET HUMOR Web site in the world for nearly fifteen years on all of the major (honest) search engines!!! It is numero uno on most of the major search engines, thanks to nice people like you.

Click on this "HOT"/active link to visit it now: http://www.danworona.50megs.com

LITERARY AGENT WANTED: Please see a special link for LITERARY AGENTS on MY FAVORITE LINKS page for more information.
DID YOU KNOW THAT NINETY-NINE POINT FIVE PERCENT (99.5%) OF MY FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR AND MY DIET HUMOR COLLECTION IS NOT FOUND ON THE INTERNET!!! 

I HAVE A "GOLDMINE" OF DIET HUMOR AND DIET JOKES, HOWEVER, THIS COLLECTION WILL REMAIN "BURIED" UNTIL IT IS PROPERLY PUBLISHED IN BOOK FORM.

CAN YOU HELP ME FIND A PUBLISHER OR OFFER A SUGGESTION? IF SO, PLEASE E-MAIL ME.

A BIG THANKY, Daniel Worona 
Please use your regular e-mail service to e-mail me at: dworona@yahoo.com.
(Please include the words FOOD HUMOR or DIET HUMOR in the Subject line of your e-mail, othwise it will be deleted and unread.)

 




KIDS JOKES GALORE:


Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a dairy cow? ... peanut butter.
 

A KOOKY COOKY COOKIE JOKE:
Q: WHY DID THE COOKIE GO TO THE DOCTORS OFFICE?
A: BECAUSE IT WAS FEELING CRUMMY. 
 

Q. Why were the screams coming from the kitchen ?
A. The cook was beating the eggs. 
 
Q: What is the biggest ant?
A: An Elephant  
 GRADE SCHOOL JOKE (Old as the hills):

Q: WHAT HAS FOUR WHEELS AND FLIES?

A: A GARBAGE TRUCK.

 

Q:If a rooster laid a brown egg and a white egg, what kind of chicks would hatch?
A: None. Roosters Don't Lay Eggs! 
 

Q: WHAT DOES A SLICE OF TOAST WEAR TO BED?
A: JAMMIES.
 (This space reserved for the KIDS JOKE you are going to send to me.) 


JOKE QUOTES:

1. HOW TO EAT SPINACH LIKE A CHILD: Divide it into piles. Rearrange again into piles. Repeat four or five times, then sit back and say you are full.

2. (This space is reserved for the JOKE QUOTE you are going to send me.)

KIDS HUMOROUS T-SHIRTS:1. Glad I'm back in school.  NOT!
2. LOOK AT ME!
3. I'M DRESSED. I'M OUTTA BED.
WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?
4. DON'T MAKE ME ANGRY. --THE HULK HAPPY JOKING!!! 

Do you have a funny T-shirt saying or a funny quote? Please e-mail it to me. dworona@yahoo.com  Please include the words KIDS JOKES in the Subject line.

(If this "HOT"/ active e-mail link does not work for you, please use your regular e-mail service.)
THE GOOD NEWS: Over the last 55-plus years I have collected tons of CLEAN JOKES FOR KIDS and nearly 250,000 DIET HUMOR / HUMOUR sayings, and DIET JOKES. Many of which are originals by yours truly.) Less than .5 percent of my collection is found on this Web site.

THE BAD NEWS: You will not be able to enjoy the other ninety-nine point five percent (99.5 %) of DIET HUMOR, FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR and lots of funny CLEAN JOKES FOR KIDS until I am properly published in book form.

CAN YOU HEOP ME FIND A PUBLISHER, OR OFFER A SUGGESTION? IF SO, PLEASE E-MAIL ME.


I do not have a friend in the world to help me get published, EXCEPT YOU.Please tell your friends about my FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR website, and my DIET HUMOR wesite http://danworona.50megs.com .


COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER: If any of the CLEAN JOKES FOR KIDS jokes, or images are in breach of copyright, I will willingly remove them and/or give proper credit.


COPYRIGHT by DANIEL L. WORONA "Rara Avis" / "Rare Bird"

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.


He has "searched the world" for more than 55-years for diet humor / humour, diet ditties, diet limericks, weight-loss humor, fat humour and diet slang. Daniel Worona has thousand's of original and unpublished diet humor sayings, diet cartoons,  and  diet word plays.

NO ONE CAN EVEN COME CLOSE TO DULICATING THIS  DIET HUMOR COLLECTION.


This is the FATTEST and best diet humor / humour collection in the world!!!

Please visist my DIET HUMOR AND CHOCOLATE HUMOR website: (The number one DIET HUMOR & DIET JOKES website in the world): www.danworona.50megs.com 

WORST CASE SCENARIO:

If for some reason my lifelong collection of more than 250,000 DIET HUMOR & DIET JOKES is never published, it will probably end up in a trash can.
 

Who loses?  Not me!   YOU DO!!!   BIG-TIME!!!

Why? Because I have had a ton of fun and a ton of laughs collecting it.

SEEKING LITERARY AGENT AND PUBLISHER: Please e-mail me if you can help. 


MY E-MAIL ADDRESS:

Yes, I will read your e-mail and diet jokes if you include the words FOOD HUMOR or DRINK HUMOR or DIET HUMOR in the Subject line of your e-mail, otherwise it will be deleted and unread.

Please use your regular e-mail service to e-mail me at: dworona@yahoo.com.